Abheek's Rendezvous with the Sage

Walking down the coastline of the Andamans,
Abheek in depth of melancholy
Was trying to cry out loud
Through the tumultuous waves of the ocean.

He knew he was wronged by Vibha.
He knew his world was all devastated.
He lost his most precious one.
And that too - just like that!
Out of a whim of the other!
A deluge of hatred, self-pity and anger
Was washing him off.
He shouted, "Why me, why me, why me??"
"What did not I do for her?"

The moon was reflecting the light from atop.
She was calm, accepting and quiet.
Ancient stars were twinkling from eternity,
Watching Abheek with empathy and care.

Walking down the sea shore,
Abheek's eyes got stuck to the grand full moon,
With all her beauty.

Suddenly the thought came to him,
Why was the nature so beautiful,
Why was the nature so happy!
It was as if a beautiful flower,
Thriving on the sad and spent bed of compost!
He was feeling like that compost,
Which was all spent and sacrificed,
For the happiness of all around!
Was there not such a big smile of happiness
And refreshing fulfillment in her twinkling eyes,
When she just snapped everything off? Everything!

In his mind he could see,
All gray compost - all in black and white,
With the bring yellow and red happy petals,
Thriving with joy!
He was sad. Very sad.
And she was all happy and indifferent!!!

Something happened suddenly.
His left feet was stuck behind,
As he was walking forward.
He turned and saw the mutilated sand,
Holding his feet.

The sand appeared to him as a sage,
A sage who was deep in meditation,
And his feet just fell on his head.
The sage was all wet.
Abheek thought it was tears of being wronged!
Apologized Abheek immediately to the sage.
The sage smiled, and said,
"My tears are of not sadness, but of joy!"
No feet can wrong me, No matter how it appears.

Abheek was curious at the speaking sand.
He squatted and came nearer to the sand.
He asked, then what wrongs thou, O sage?
The sage smiled again with tranquility,
It is my arrogance and jealousy
That wrongs me. It is not your feet,
But my pride, that holds me higher than your feet!

Being one with One dream of the God,
The sage continued,
I can see God in all creation, in all circumstances,
In everything around!
What appears mutilation and being wronged to you,
Is just a "prasadam" for me, O Abheek!
"Prasadam" from the all pervading Self!
To show me the Truth.

As Abheek sat there, listening the sage,
The wave of the ocean came on,
And washed away the sage forever!
The sage disappeared in the vastness of that night!
Abheek did not know when the sage of born,
And why suddenly he perished!
He questioned the ruthless indifference of nature!

But then, from somewhere,
The soul of the sage whispered in his ears,
"It is my arrogance and jealousy that wrongs me,
Not nature or anything out there!"

(PS - This is part of my forthcoming novel - MISFIT. Abheek Bose is the main protagonist of the story)
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Copy Right © All rights reserved - Samrat Kar

The Recurrence of Loss

So Abheek continued...
I used to think the cloud fades just once.
But then I realized it fades continuously,
Each moment, forever - leaving that sinking emptiness in heart,
Till eternity.

I used to think I couldn't go a day without your smile.
Without telling you things and hearing your voice back!
I used to think atlast I got you forever!
Like the two sides of the river,
I thought we will live together till eternity in that bond ecstatic!

Then, that day arrived and it was so damn hard
But the next was harder.
And I knew with a sinking feeling
It was going to get worse and
I wasn't going to be okay for a very long time!
A very very long time!
Probably Never!

Because losing someone isn't an occasion or an event.
It doesn't just happen once.
It happens over and over again.
I lose you every time I think of RS
I lose you every time I think of A'L
I lose you every time I listen to that song
I lose you every time I watch that movie
I lose you every time your favorite phrases appear in my memory!

I lose you every time I think of kissing you,
Holding you or wanting you.
I go to bed at night just to lose you again.
And when I wish I could tell you about my day,
Start from the early morning or then after the tired long day,
I lose you again.

With every breath I take in, I inhale a painful prick in my heart of your loss,
With every breath I release, I give away another moment of my life,
Sanctified with your bleeding Loss of your nearness.

Is this just a loss? Or is it something more?
For it is my own sacred secret.
It is my own sanctum, my special personal altar!
It is something very special - my own,
Which none can take away!
Its my well-cherished love,
My well-cherished pain!
For more than a decade of this life,
And countless births before..
Is not just another story of love!
It is a saga of the pursuit of God!

Praying for you...
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Copy Right © All rights reserved - Samrat Kar